Slipping back into oblivion.

I was going to post another blog on here about how God is so amazing and be all inspirational and stuff, but then I realized that would be a lie.

The truth is, I haven't been doing a whole lot of talking to God, or even thinking about Him.

I have two books I started reading, and I haven't even cracked them open in about two weeks.  I skipped church on Sunday morning because I needed to catch up on sleep after an exhausting weekend, and then I skipped church Wednesday night because I was hanging out with friends.

I want to have a rock-solid relationship with God, I just don't want to do the leg work required to have it.  I'm sure if I think about this long enough, I'll come up with a very self-analytical reason for ignoring God, because that's what I do.

The truth is, self analyzing is not going to get me anywhere.  And usually when I do this, I'm just trying to avoid the issue at hand anyway.

I find it ironic that I was telling someone not that long ago that although I wake up two hours before I have to be at work in the morning, I still don't make time for God.  My reason was that the first thing I do when I wake up is get online and check Facebook and Twitter, and read celebrity stories on E! online and People.  Then, this week, my phone mysteriously lost it's 3G internet connection and I can't use internet on it at all.  I'm paying $30/month for this feature, and yet I still don't have internet.

Is this God trying to get me to spend a little time with Him every morning?  Sounds like it.  The bad thing is that even though I'm not getting online every morning, I'm still not making that time.

I think it's time for me to just MAKE myself focus on God.  What I want to have and what I want to do in order to GET what I want are very different right now, and I am the only one who can change that.